rude questions for meditation
Meditation is a critical element of Zen Rude-ism. It is just as Pying-Pyong asked his pupils, "Why don't you go someplace perhaps no less than a million miles away and sit in a position that you find uncomfortable for you to be in so you'll stop with the bothering of people all the time and you'll maybe be staying put for a change and doing not a thing for let's say five to seven years or longer it should be too soon?"
Just as Chin, Shin, and the other pupils of the Rude-ist Masters had their wisdom upon which to meditate, so we provide you here with a variety of spiritual conundrums to occupy your thoughts and bring you closer to your own Rude Awakening.
We have found that obsessing about one question each day for a week has made us significantly Ruder. We hope you will find the same. About yourself, that is, not us. We mean, we hope you will find yourself Ruder. Not Ruder than we are, but Ruder than you were before. We don't mind if you're Ruder than we are--it's not like a competition or anything, but that's not what we hope for. Not because we're comparing, but...whatever.
week one
What is the deal with that guy?
week two
Do I look like I give a rat's ass?
week three
What's a guy gotta do to get a little service around here?
week four
Who asked you, anyway?
week five
I've lost my ticket - can I still collect my shoes?
week six
Geez, make it a little hotter in here, why don't you?
(additional thought for deeper meditation: I'd like to melt my ass off)
week seven
You wanna hear the sound of one man snapping?
week eight
So the soup today...any good?
week nine
How am I? Can I just tell you about this lower back pain? Have you seen how I'm sitting here? Do I look comfortable to you?
week ten
What, do you work for Rubbermaid or something?
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